Man, I say this A LOT!

July huh? When did that happen? I’m guessing right after June, but these days I can never be quite sure. Still, it’s only 3 months since I last updated so…

So anyway, things are awesome! The construction firm has had three months so flat that I almost poured maple syrup on them. So many keys have come off my writing machine that I’ve had to stash it in file 13 and I’m growing a bloody rhino horn. 

Despite my new snout adornment, the failing business (technically I picked up 2 contracts today, so I can eat next month) and a bout of Venusian flu, I have actually managed to get some writing done.

 I didn’t keep up my book a month game  (I’ve always had a habit of setting goals I can’t reach), but I do have a collection of short fiction in various genres ready to roll. It’s edited, formatted and just waiting for some cover art (obviously I spout about it when I’m done).

Also, I’m currently (well, not right this second) working on a bit of space opera. It goes a little something like this:

After being abandoned on a freight-hub world, a mercenary spends his time hunting vermin to gain enough money to get his kit out of hock and his arse off world. After turning down worm as a hired gun due to some personal reasons, he crosses a bunch of pirates, he finds himself picking up the gig he wanted to avoid.

There’s more to it, and it’s coming along nicely. Of course, I’d like to get it done and out by the month’s end, but we both know late August is more realistic. Again, I’ll keep you posted.

I think that’s enough from me, mostly because my take-away has arrived.

It’s grim out west

It’s April 4th. That means I’m late telling you all I missed deadline for the second supernatural adventure story. Once again I made a promise I didn’t keep. 

My reason this time? Research.
See, I had a look at my sales figures. Predayne and Scav are ticking along nicely. The graph looks like a stegosaur’s back. Even a couple of crime thrillers I wrote a few years ago (under someone else’s name) are have started moving again. Wood Hollow (as I type) has sold 2 copies.

Don’t get me wrong. I was mega excited to see that double spike. I told Lady Orchid with rabid delight then felt the sensation evaporate as I watched her face shift into a look of either guilt or constipation. Turns out Orchid and her best mate Wolfie picked up a copy each to boost my sales.

So anyway. Horror obviously isn’t my strong point. Stark has been sent to the naughty step and I’m working on something a little more spacey.

I’ll definitely get it done by the month’s end.

The beat goes on

It’s Tuesday. My hectic work schedule has been knocked back by three days (issues with other contractors) and Wood Hollow us out on the virtual shelves.

Other than stroll the dog, my diary is looking pretty empty. Lucky for me, my Random Awesome Generator is always ready to come up with something epic. This morning it tells me I’ll be doing something a little supernatural again.

Since there’s 17 days left in March, I reckon I’ll be able to get another Ryan Stark jaunt done and dusted by the first of April.

I’ll let you know how I get one

Wood Hollowed Out

Wood Hollow by [Grimaldi, J.P]


There it is, the cover for my latest offering. It’s just over 10k words long and retails at a MASSIVE¬† ¬£0.99/$1.20. I know that’s asking a lot, but I have a dog and jeez can she fill her jowly little face!

Here’s the link for .com version

And here’s

If you do pick it up, I’ll love you forever (or probably only ’til Tuesday) and if you leave a review (even if you think the book sucks and I should die in an horrific ice cream-related accident) I’d probably manage to stretch out ’til Wednesday.

Aaaaand we’re done!

Wood Hollow (yeah, changed the title during the edit) is now crawling through the KDP system. I’ll receive an email when it’s good and done.

Obviously, I’ll post a link here when I can. Right now, I’m off to start a new project. I’ll let you know what I’m up to when I’ve read the runes (okay, perl generators I put together).

And That’s a Wrap

Stark Truth is done. Outlines written. First drafts typed and expanded into second draft madness.

Okay, I need to format the thing, give it one final read through then sort out the matter of a pesky cover, but the thing itself is finished.

Despite the fact I’ll probably change a couple things (most likely the title), Sand Dragon has his copy. That’s one of six (?) China Offerings made.

I think I’m done for the night, so I’m off to grab a beer, see Lady Orchid and chow down on some noodles before waking up tomorrow and working on offering numero dos.


Big Fat Stinky Excuses

I said I’d get Stark Truths (or whatever) finished by this evening. I said I’d have it wrapped up and ready to go tonight (despite having no cover designed as yet). I said I was awesome. I’m a big fat stinky liar.

Yep, I’m roughly one scene away from project completion (except the cover thing) and I’m calling it for the night. I could tell you that I work a manual job, it’s been a hard day and that I’m tired. I could rattle off the number of unexpected social engagement that sucked up writing hours over the weekend. I could just admit that I’m a lazy blob of lard and logging on to WoW seems like a better use of my time than writing. I could tell you all that, and I guess I just did.

I’m tired and I’m going to need a day’s extension and that’s going to make the Sand Dragon cry.

Updates. Updates. Not a lot of Updates!

Well February went fast. Shifted out the window with the speed of a greased-up burglar. I wanted to get an update on here every week of this year, but I guess that shifty little tea leaf made off with all my time and motivation.

Actually, I have plenty of motivation, it just happens to be for other projects. In my last update I mentioned my good buddy is currently living it large in China and before he left I said I’d drop him a novelette/novella every month he’s away.

The first Chinese Offering is coming along strong. I’m about 40% through the second rewrite and still set to finish up E.O.B Monday. As usual my weekend is jam packed busy, but to (mis)quote the anathema of my youth you gotta live while you’re alive and sleep when you’re dead.

The first offering will be one of six. The current is a two-fisted pulp horror yarn featuring a messed up smuggler and a group of nefarious cultists. Unlike my previous offerings, it’s set in modern day England with a low magic garnish. 

Anyway, if I’m going to get finished on schedule, I’d best bugger off back to the corner 

Happy Epileptic Lust Plague Day

Of all the bullshit festivals that are pushed annually in an effort to part us from our hard-earned, this is the one I hate most.  Not only was the ‘celebration’ first mentioned by that professional fibber Chaucer, but it only really came to prominence in the 19th century. Two guys who had nothing better to do with their time wanted to Christianise an ancient mid-february pagan festival (possibly Imbolc but I don’t read about that stuff anymore) and decided to go for some fruity love fool as champion. 

Okay, I might just be sore that Saint V’s other areas of influence were ignored. I’m pretty convinced that we’d all be happier celebrating plague and epilepsy. Hell, happy loved up zombie day would sit just fine in my calendar. Of course, my gears might be grinding because it was a year ago todau that I punched out 17.5k words on Scavenger Hunt.

I haven’t really written squat since then. All the excuses in the world could fly from my fingertips but honesty is the best policy (unless it isn’t) so I’ll just admit I’ve been lazy.

Something about the mid February love up must be in the air though. Yesterday I punched out an outline for a bit of sword and sorcery fic set in a kind of (but not identical to) Hyborean world. It’s darker than my usual spec fic and (at present) will provably cover at least three books. I’ve got to get this first one done by the end of thr month as there’s a toad in Mongolia waiting for a read.

Anyway, belated happy new year. I’m off to walk the dog.

Excuses. An update.

Busy is still my middle name. At this time of year things have usually slowed to a crawl so I can tackle the festive panic with wide eyes and aching heartburn. Not so this year. On top of that, this is also the first year I’ve had to deal with the presence of greedy little ankle biters. At my age, it’s been a steep learning curve.

All this means my 20k splatter extravaganza is coming along slower than I’d hoped (one day I’ll manage a 17.5k run again). The makie-it-up-as-you-go thing still feela kind of slow, but it’s also making my creative brain run on overdrive. I still don’t know much about what’s going to happen, but it turns out my protag is some kind of martial artist (which is handy) and that the action has shifted to a secondary world. I’ve got a rough idea of how things are going to end but that may well change. I’ll see when I get there.

I have to say I’m constantly tempted to grab a pencil and work a quick outline, but I went into this with the intention of writing blind and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. What is interesting is that I’ve crossed off my scheduled minimum daily word count every day since starting. Although some days the words take longer to form than on others, they are coming each and every day.

That’s pretty unprecedented. I have more unfinished manuscripts choking my hard drive than I do extra pounds of fat around my waist. One of them, a fully plotted space oper adventure, was killed well into the 30k mark. I can’t say for sure, but I think the reason for my uninterrupted writing might stem from the face every day is a little voyage of discovery. That said ‘The Story So Far’ (I know, shite working title) is no where near 30k.

I’ve also been reading some stuff by the Realm and Sands guys, which I’d like to go into on a later post. For now though, I have a word count to spit out so have a nice weekend and I’ll catch up later.